why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize