he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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