weddingsv make me drug and hornr
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
