margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
