My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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