Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
how does that bad decision feel?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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