If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
