I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
