So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
