Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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