A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I want her autograph on my taint
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize