my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
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We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
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We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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