goodnight i made you a song goodbye
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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