We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize