if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
His nipple licking is glorious
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