I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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