Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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