I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize