Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Your penis caused this!
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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