I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
she peed on how many people?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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