ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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