when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
