Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
