just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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