How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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