I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize