I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
