Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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