I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
accomplished twins. life is a go
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
