First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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