i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
