hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize