Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
