btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Randomize
