When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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