just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
