But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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