I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
