smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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