she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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