Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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