OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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