At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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