We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
