I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
