So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
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