A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
