I think my vagina is haunted
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
