My first STD was from a foam party
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize