uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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