I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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