Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
He better not be in your backpack
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
