I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize