Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
